have you ever wished that someday you'll find a time machine that will take you back to some situation. i have.

and if there's a time machine, i'd choose to go back to a time in junior high. grade 8 is the best. everyday for me is very great.
yesterday, i went to kemang with my junior high friends, my bestfriends. and we were in the car talking about our days back in junior high. and i forgot how i loved my life in junior high. it felt like there's no problem in my life, and even if there is, it didn't burdened me because everyday is filled with laughter with them. just like what they say, laugh is the best medicine. it's very true. when you're with your friends and you laugh together, all your problem seems to go away. in gr8, everyday is filled with laughter, there's never a day that we don't laugh together. we laughed at anything. small things, big things. anything that was funny for us. you know how silly we could be when we're with friends. i enjoyed that time so much.

i'm not saying that high school sucks, it's just not as good as junior high. i loved my junior high so much, that in the first day of my high school seems so hard. i can't find a friend like my friends in junior high. well, maybe it's because i'm in a veryyy new environment and i just need to get used to it. well, it was a pretty hard time for me to get used to a new situation. but as time goes by, i realised that i'm gonna spend at least 3years of my life there, so there's nothing much to do, but to try hard to fit in there. and here i am. i've survive for two years in my new school.

i'm the kind of person, that when i'm used to some situation for quite a long time, i'd be difficult to try something new. easy to say that people "like to try something new" but it's not that easy for me. hahaa. maybe it's just me or whatever.
even i've survived for two years in my high school, i still feel uncomfortable. i still hope that i'm still in my old school, with my old friends.
but sometimes i'm thankful that i go to a different school. so that i'm not monotone, i've tried something new, and i made some new friends, so that makes me have a lot of friends.

well, maybe if there really is a time machine, i wouldn't go back to any time. because if i go back to junior high, for sure, i wouldn't go to my new school now for high school. i'd stay at my old school. and if i do that, i wouldn't met my new friends and i wouldn't even met my current boyfriend. and i knew that i'm gonna regret that. my life would be "just like that", without something new. but well, it's a lil difficult to fit in to a new environment. but when you fit in, you'll feel just fine.

this is where i'm gonna past 3/5 of my teenage years. so i'm not gonna spend it, just feeling sad because things weren't just the way i wanted it. i'm gonna make the most of it. maybe it's a lil hard to fit in here. but trying to fit in, made me more mature than i am before. and i'm happy of it. i'm still a silly kid when i'm with my friends, but i also can be mature when needed.

do you have a super nerd in your school. of course you do.
the type of person who uses thick glasses, hair untidy, how they use their clothes. or maybe some one who is fat, veeery-dark-skinned, smelly, ugly, you name it.
let's call that type of person "the-X".
have you ever made a joke and tell some one, "the-X is you girl/boy friend hahaha" and then that person will say, "ihh najisss".

i just heard it today in my class. i even forgot who the-X is. but when i heard that, i felt sorry for the-X. it's not their fault that they're, maybe, not beautiful/handsome. it's not their choice to be fat or short or whatever it is.
if they can asked for something like that, i'm sure they would.
i just feel sorry if i were them. if i'm so ugly, and people made fun of me. it's not like they're the one who wants to be like that.

i admit, sometimes i do things like that, like talking about the-X behind their back. but i admit, too, a minute later, i feel veeeryyy bad. there's this student in my school, who's unable to hear without hearing-aid and one of her eye is unable to see. last year, when i was in grade 10, i do talk about her behind her back. but now i don't do that anymore. there's a time when i suddenly realized, how awful it would be if i were her. i used to be, well, not very mean. but mean enough. i should've treat her well. and i regreted it. if i were her, maybe i'm not brave enough to go to regular school. she's very willing to study eventhough she has a disability to hear. me and my friends often talked about her, well i don't talked about her much, just my friends, i just laugh along with them, which is bad enough.

**
other than that, do you have a friend who is sooooooo fat, that people made fun of her? i do. i'm not talking about fat boy, maybe it's normal if a boy is fat, but when a girl is fat, people often made fun of them. for example, when a fat girls, let's call them Fgirls, uses a fashionable clothes, people would say "ihh, kepedean bgt tu org". some people say worse things. they talked about Fgirls as if they're not human who could do whatever they want. everything they do is wrong. they wanna look pretty, it's wrong. they wanna look cute, it's wrong. i couldn't imagine how depressing it would be.

things like being fat can be changed, they can take diet program and be skinny in a year or maybe two. but having a disability to hear like my friend that i mentioned, she has to take it with her her whole life. she's born like that. and we still talk about her, sometimes i think we're a very bad person.
the reason we talked about her is almost because she is so aggresive to the boy she liked. well, so she show her love exaggeratingly, is that wrong? maybe she don't know much what to do when she has a crush to a guy. she doesn't have a normal childhood. she spent her childhood in a "special school". so maybe no one told her about the "puppy-love" thing and what to do.
i do regret things like that. i felt bad when i talked about her.
she is special, because she was born with it, it's not her choice to be special.
**

everybody have a negative-side, everybody does. but that's not something to be made fun of. if someone can't stand to see someone's negativity, the least thing that they could do is to ignore it.
easy to talk. LOL :p

oh my god, i'm very tired this past few days.
it started on sunday. that day, when i'm supposed to study chemistry, i have to think stuff for hani's surprise. i didn't mind, it just took a lot of me. at night, i still have to take the cake that i ordered, and have to go someplace else to find a candle bcos unfortunately that bakery didn't have any candle.

that night, i cudn't sleep. i'm tired, i'm sleepy, but somehow i can't sleep. maybe i sleep at 1 am. in the morning, i have to woke up at 4.45 to get ready and rush to pick up my friends to go to hani's house for his surprise. well, but the surprise didn't go how i planned, but at least it succeeded. he already woke up when we came, but he didn't even expect us.

that day i'm soooo sleepy. when i got home, it was 6 o clock, i clean myself until 7pm. i fell asleep then, my mom promised that she wud woke me up on 8 o clock, i have set an alarm too. but well, maybe i'm so kebo that i woke up on 10pm. hani kept calling me. thanks to him. then i study for the next day's exam. and slept at 12am++.

now here i am, watching friends and i don't even have the will to study for biology tomorrow. it's bcos there's so many to study. the teacher didn't even gave us any kisi kisi. and now i'm so screwed. i'm very sleepy. yet i don't have any time to sleep. bcos there;s so much to study. while i'm still watching friends :p. well well, this is what happen when laziness come :p

I'M SO SLEEPY AND TIRED!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN IT.

ahhh, cape banget dehh ni hari.
udah kemaren malemnbya tidurnya rada subuh, bangunny pagi gitu, trus mesti jalan2x klilingin satu mall, keluar dengan tanpa hasil. trus pindah ketempat laen buat nyari kadonya hani, baru deh ketemu yang gue cari, hihi. bagus dehh :p.
trus masi rada jalan2x juga tuh dsana, kaki g ampe sakit banget. u know how it feels like when u're wearing flaty and walk for hours. untung g ga jadi pake spatu yg rada ada heels dikit, klo ga bisa beli sendal jepit tuh, ahahaa. so pegel. hani, you shoulld be thankful :p bytheway, can't mention the place that i go. takut si hani ngeliat ni blog. ahaha.

trus mengakhiri perjalanan ke gadingg deh. ke n.y.l.a dapet rok 2. wuhuuu bagus loh, murahmurah gitu lagi, hehee. puas dehh. udah gitu udah gitu g windy ma cyn ke dantee deh, oiah tadi pas nyari kado buat hani ada si coy, tp si cyn ga ikut, hahah. jadi tadi k gdg masih nyari kado jg c, tp ga ampe kliling, abis uda rada malem, uda gempor jg. ahaha. makan dante sihh g makan potato wedges, byasa langganan ahahaha. potato wedges ny is so delicioussss !!!ahahaha, pgen nyoba nachosnya :(

nah uda gituu, kita ke bensol deh, ahaha. disana duduk2x aj sih ngobrol2x. recover dari pegel yang tadi, ahaha. udah gitu kita pulang deh. g ampe hum stenga 11an gitu. dan skrg pala g lg pusing aduhai deh. keknya sih dikit lagi sakit :p ahahaha, jarang cape ampe kek gini, skaliny kek gini sakit deh. ahaha. once again, you should be thankful hani !!ahahah. tp gue seneng2x aj c jj daritadi, wlpn pegel tp kekny enak aja gitu ngliat2x barang ma ngliat2x orang. ahaha. tadi jg dapet baju2x ma dompet gitu, ih senangnya, ahhaa. norak ah.

bytheway ini uda tgl 8 yah, pdhl ini kjadian critanya tgl 7. aahaha. krn ud tgl 8, well happy sweet 17 deh buat angga, ahaha.

olraiittt, skrg g mo tdurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
ps: betis gue bekonde 4 biji grgr kbanyakan jalan :p

every people have 5 main senses. hearing, seeing, smelling, touching, tasting. but there's the sixth sense. this one, not every people has it.

indra keenem, percaya ga ya? pecaya ga pecaya sihh.
temen skolah g, panggilannya amsur, singkatan dari amelia surya. udah satu sekolah setaon lebih, baru denger skrg kalo dya tuh punya semacem indra keenem gitu deeeh jadi bisa ngeliat2x. kemaren pas telponan sama hani, si hani crita gitu temennya yang pernah diramalin sama sih amsur. g bertekad hari ini harus nanya2x.

nah, bener. tadi pas istirahat kedua gitu g kekelas ny dia, ternyata uda rame pada ngumpul. wkaka. but g sih percaya ga percaya lahh. banyak pasangan2x yang si amsur bilang ga cocok2x gitu. tadi si windy bilang "klo gini lama2x smua pasangan putus deh abis diramal amsur". hm, g bilang sih ga gitu yah, kalo emang dibilang ga cocok sama si amsur, itu bukan salah dia, dari kitanya aja, kita ngerasa cocok apa nga ma pasangan kita sendiri. klo emang cocok, ya udah, ngapain dengerin kata2x orang. kek g ma hani, biarpun dibilang ga cocok, g sih ga jadiin beban yah, tar malah putus beneran lagi klo nginget2x kata2x amsur mulu. hehee.

tadi sih si clara nyuruh amsur bilang clara demennya ma siapa. ehh ternyata amsur salah bilang orang. jadi clara rada bimbang gitu pecaya ma amsur, hehee. tapi katanya klo si agum di ramalinnya beneran. g jadi bingung. hahahaa. tapi g rasa, ga perlu lah tau tau masa depan. kita udah gede, pasti tau yang mana yang bener yang mana yang salah. masa depan que sera sera aja. let it flow. right?

malah kalo kita tau masa depan kita entar, malah jadi beban lagi. contoh, orang kalo diramalin udah gede miskin, adanya kan orang malah jadi pesimis duluan. hahaa. mending gausah tau tau gituan lah. just do the best that we can. our future is in our own hand. no one could tell, because by time to time, people change. that means their future will also change, so g rasa kalo ada orang yang percaya klo diramalin masa depan ga ada salahnya. but i don't wanna know anything about it. kita yang nentuin masa depan kita sendiri. well, other than that, God also. hahaa.

ok, im off. mo blajar ppkn. huuuuuuuu. this week is full of exams! i feel tiredddd. nywayy, i'm still planning on what to give my hani for his bdayyyy. : )

olrait olrait, kemaren itu sih capee ahahaha.
jadi kmaren itu g bangun jam11an, padahal rencana awal tuh mo dateng pagian, soalnya kn g kalo siap2x tuh lama banget, ahahah. tapi mo gimana lagi, emang dasarnya kebo, uda masang alarm tetep aj kaga bangun, hehee.

trus kemaren itu g kirakira siapsiap dkk sampe jem 1an gitu deh. trus ol sambil nonton sambil nunggu dijemput ma fby bla ma ary. hari itu rencananya mo ke kemang, tadinya sih mo ke ex, tapi ga jadi deh. lagi pengen nongkrong katanya. ahaha.
nah, uda gitu kemaren itu g nungguin mreka jemput sampe jem3 sore. well emang lama, dasar lu orang! ahaha, sampe sempet tidur gitu sambil nungguin dia orang. trus yauda deh, hari itu critanya mo makan warung pasta sama apa bistro gitu deh, yang bistro2x itu kata fby enak.

sampe2x di kemang kita ke warung pasta dulu, setelah meraba2x jalan nyampe lah kita ke warung pasta dengan hokinya tanpa nanya orang, ahahhaa. uda gitu, akhirnya kita pesen deh. g siyok liat harga makanannya! oke banget. ahahaha.

akhirnya kita pesen:
1. meat lover pasta buat feby
2. lasagna buat feby
3. pasta apaa gitu buat bla
4. meat lover panggang topped with melted cheese for me
5. bloody mary panggang topped with melted cheese for ary
6. chesse pizza with extra smoked beef topping ditengah2x
6. jus sirsak, which looks more like "buavita sirsak" hahaha
7. refillable iced tea buat fby dan ary
8. ice milo buat bla

stelah terkenyang2x, abisnya cuma 162k, w/o tax sih itu. hahahaa. dari sana kita ngobrol2x lama gitu sambil ketawa2x. g ma bla crita2x tentang retreat gitu, si fby crita tentang live in ny, keknya live in ny kocak juga, sampe nganter anak tempat dia tinggal ke skolah, wkakwa. trus ada anak cowo yang baru umur dua taon kalo digendong maunya megang ********** ahaha. diajarin apaan tuh ma bapanya, wkawka.

bla crita crita selama dia hiking pas retreat itu dia sempat ngelakuin hal2x bodoh, trus nyrritain crita2x lucu dia gitu, ampe kita ber4 ngakak gede2x dengan ga tau malunya. hahah.

abis dari sana karna bosen kita ke mobil, still dunno where to go. akhirnya ngeliat teras cafe, kita muter buat ke sana. abis markir, kita masuk. masukmasuk ada aer mancur gitu, kebetulan c bla pengen pipis, nah akhirrnya nanya tuh satpam yang ada dideket pintu masuknya. g takut tar d sangkain kita masuk cumen mo numpang wc lg, ahhaha. nah abis bla pipis, kita nanyain ke satpamnya dimana yg namanya teras cafe sm sushi underground, stelah sampe disana, kita kecewa gitu ngeliat tempatnya. akhirnya kita ke parkiran lagi dehh, sampe di mobil g blg "ko kita kg foto ya tadi? aer mancurnya bagus tuh. mendingan kita masuk, foto, trus abis itu ary langsung jemput kita d lobby, trus cabut ahahahaha" maksud g bcanda. ehhh ternyata beneran aje, dilakuin. akhirnya kita b4 masuk, foto2x dengan alesan lagi nungguin orang. wkakwka. tu satpam udah ngeliatiiiin terus, dia ampe bediri. trus pas kita jalan pergi purapura ke sushi underground, dia baru duduk. akhirnya kita keluar dr sushi underground pny pintu kluar yang gda satpamnya.

kita akhirnya masuk mbl dan akhirnya kita pergi ke pizza marzano. tadiny emang pengen kesana, cuma kelewatan terus. pas masuk, rencananya mo pesen es teh 4 biji, trus duduk poto2x. wkakwakwka, tapi karna kita masi punya sdikit rasa malu. akhirnya kita milih pizza yg namanya american pollo, trus pesen minum ice blackcurrant (refillable :p) sama fby mo nyobain mocktailnya.
nih rincian harga: pizza 67k, ice blackcurrant 20k, mocktaikl 35k. wkakw, abis mesen dengan dikit gitu, kita ketawaaaaaaaaaaa mlu. ampe brisik banget. emang ga tau diri, uda mesen dikit, brisik lagi. tadi nya dilantai atas tuh ada yang birthday gitu, jadi makan gratis :p. tadinya pengen gilagilaan coba naek, tp kita mengurungkan niat, hoho.

akhirnya kita makan2x trus ngobrol2x ketawa2x, trus foto2x. hehee. pas mo minta refill iced blekcurrantny, embaembanya bilang "sorry de, tapi kaloe di share ga bisa refill". ternyata tu emba liat, ada 2 sedotan di ice blackcurrantny, emang g share ma bla. biasa pengiritan anak muda. hehe. trus yauda deh, akhirnya tunggu tu emba ngeblakangin kita, g manggil mas2x bertampang polos gitu. sedotanny uda g ambil satu, trus g minta refill. pas masnya dengan polosnya ngerefill, emba yang tadi nolak neengok bentar gitu, tp dia kek ga nyadar gitu. wkakaka. abis d refill, g ma bla minumnya di kolong, wkakaka, biar ga ktauan abis refill. trus fby jg mau, akhirnya kita oper lewat kolong, ahahaa, dodol banget. kek orang susah :p
gitu terus deh ampe tinggal dikit, baru kita taro meja lagi.huff.

stelah dari sono, kita pulang ddehh, rada rada sdikit macet lah. tapi akhirnya nyampe skola g jem8 malem dehh. uda gitu ngikutin acara spartans cumen bentaran :p. pas g dateng tangga pas lagi lagu trakhir gitu, nyanyi lagu hebat gitu. pada ramee banget. hahah. trus uda deh ngikutin gitu2x, sambil ngobrol dkk, abis itu g ke gading skitar jem stenga 10an, jemput adenya hani. trus si hani nganterin g pulang deh. jem stenga 11 akhirnya g sampe rumah. mgkn stenga 11 orang baru dateng ke halloween party mreka, g malah udah sampe rumah :p, well watever, i had a lot of fun today! : )

i'm off

udah lamaaaa banget deh ga nge-post. ga tau knp, waktu itu sempet male gitu ngetik2x ginian. ahahhaa, trus skg jd mood nulis lagi deh : ) hehee.
cape deh ni harii : (

sminggu ini tapi cihuy banget sih, pulangny jem stenga 1 mlu, soalnya pulangpulang spartans, wlpn males nunggu mpe jem stenga 3, tp lmyn deh yah, ga blajar lama2x. baru blajar bentar, tautau uda bel ganti plajaran. hihiii.

so, hari ini hari trakhir lomba2x gitu, besok udah spartans night, which smak 2 ktanya bakal ngundang tangga buat jd bintang tamu gitu. ga tau deh besok dateng apa kg, hahah. rencana sih mo jalan ma fby dya orang, tp klo ga jadi paling jln ma my love, ahahaa.

so, so, so... hari ini cape banget, hahah. pulangpulang dirumah nonton click, emang udah lama sih tuh felem, justru itu g uda lupa, ahaha.
nah nonton itu g nangis deh, hihi. abis kesian banget : ( trus jem 7an gitu si hani dateng deh kerumah, dia malahan blon pernah ntn click sama skali, ahaha. jd lah g ntn click(again). dia spertinya terharu jg deh, tp sok ditahantahan, wkawkkw. well well, namanya juga cowo :p.

skrg g lagi capeeee banget dan ngantuk, lagi nungguin kabar dr fby bla dya orang, jadi pergi ga woii? g bingung ni, klo ga jadi g mo bkin plan laen, hahah.
by the by, skrg hot gosipnya itu ada couple gitu d kelas g, namanya clara alverina chai sama wilson santana. emang 22nya lagi jomblo gitu :p hahah, they're meant for each other :p cocok2x aja sih gue liat prasaan, hahaa : )
by the by againn, happy birthday to agnes ashianti linanda today, smoga cepet jadi ma empri : p HAHAAA : )
well, i'm off.

I am Stephanie Gondosiswanto ; Sweet sixteen this year.
My birthday's on September 4 1993.
Going to SMAK 2 BPK Penabur
I Like: eating, that's where I got all the fat :p
I Dislike: seeing annoying people.